Faith

Faith is something you can’t see or touch, it’s a feeling of knowing your right where your meant to be.

Having faith in God is something that happened to me a long time ago, I’m unsure if it wasn’t always there in bedded in me somewhere. My first Experience was a profound and wonderful thing, as a child I would stare for hours at the moon I was entranced by his beauty it fascinated me and I felt comfort in knowing that every night He would be there smiling down at me. I was mesmerised and would sit just staring at it, In fact I thought I had some kind of moonlight madness !

When I was 14 my parents announced we were selling the family home and would be moving. As a teenager you know that your hood was your heart especially in the 1980s where we would gather and hang out, brake dancing on the Lino in the street, we all knew each other we were a gang a fellowship a collective of kids from the same street or nearby, we would meet outside after school and go in when it was dark! and the thought of moving to a place where my friends would not be was the end of my world as I knew it.

I was completely heart broken all I could think of was how on earth will survive with out my friends my gang, this was my patch my home where I belonged.

I spent hours crying in my bedroom and one night the moon was full and there he was with his crooked smile staring at me , that night I told him all my worries my woes about moving house, I cried my heart out , and looked to him for reassurance. As I started to ask, please show me a sign that everything will be ok, the biggest brightest shooting star flew past in slow motion, I had barley finished the sentence and the wonderful amazing sight behold me. I knew from that moment I had received a sign I felt that calm wave pour over me and I knew everything would be ok.

That was the start of my journey with. God (the moon) .

It’s been a rocky road, faith is like that sometimes your fully emerged and other times your just dipping your toe in , sometimes I feel close to god and sometimes I feel completely alone. I think that’s pretty normal as life is like that. But one thing for sure he has my heart and this will not be shaken.

I used to go to church as a Brownie for church parade and I went to Sunday school, I do not come from a religious family, my Nan believed in god and in her last years I would take her to church, she loved the singing the best. I wanted to get christened when I was 13 but I was told I had to stand at the front of church and talk, I was very under confident back then and that was so fearful for me that I didn’t follow it through. I drifted away after brownies and girl guides and became a teenager, I did not return to church until I was getting married the first time around! At 28 I walked back into the same church and it felt like I had returned home, we had to go to Church for 6 months in order to be married there , that summer before I was married I was christened. I remember standing up at the front of the congregation and I felt different, something really had changed, I felt the hole inside my heart was no more. I can’t explain that feeling I had , as if the last piece of the jigsaw was added. It was powerful and I felt emotional I could actually feel the change inside me. I have been going to church ever since.

Even having been christened I’ve drifted and been close and far away. But what I have realised is if you give god your undivided attention and you talk to him he does listen. Faith is a feeling that Your not alone, you don’t have to walk in darkness, you don’t have to go through bad things on your own. It’s very hard to explain to a non believer and I wish I had the right words and theory’s to explain it. But it’s something you can’t see or touch but it is there. Faith is like coincidences or fate In fact most of the time that’s Exactly what it is, when you come away from something and say now that’s weird that’s a coincidence, I don’t think it is I feel that’s exactly what was meant to happen. All things happen for a reason I’m a true believer in that. What will be will be, and you can’t change that. I believe it’s gods work.

I’m probably not your stereo typical Christian and I like that fact! I’m normal I’m bonkers! And I am just me. Sometimes people are genuinely surprised when I say I go to church and I love that. Because faith is for everyone, god doesn’t rule out anyone , he loves us all the same . I like being different eccentric and not conforming to what people think.

Take a leap of faith I bet you will experience that coincidence and you will question it! But just think what if it Really is god. Faith is to believe what you do not see; the reward of this faith is to see what you believe.

Faith in God is not a blind leap without any evidence or, even worse, contrary to the evidence. Faith is simply trust. The Christian trusts in God. The scientific atheist has faith in science. If an atheist uses the scientific method to discover a medicine and then takes that medicine, he is exercising faith. He trusts his data, and he trusts that the medicine will cure him, not poison him. Some people may take the medicine with no thought whatsoever as to how it was developed or as to who prepared it. Others may only take the medicine after thoroughly investigating every aspect of the research. One person may take it with great confidence while another person takes it tentatively. In the final analysis, anyone who takes the medicine is exercising faith in the medicine. Ultimately, it is not the strength of the faith that determines if the medicine will work, but the efficacy of the medicine. Great faith in bad medicine will not cure a person. It is the object of faith, not the strength of faith that makes the difference. Uncertainty about a good medicine will not hinder its efficacy, as long as it is taken as prescribed.

Ive been closer to god these past few months and he has answered my prayers , when I laid it all out and bared my soul and truly let him take the reins things started happening, I heard a voice telling me to be still, instead of worrying about all theses things , all these choices and wondering what direction to go in, he said be still, if you are confused then stop, don’t do anything, so I did just that and things started to happen on his terms not mine on his timing, not mine.

I can’t make anyone believe in god and I respect those that have no faith, but I do think you’re missing out, what if you just gave it a go? and your prayers were answered? What have you got to loose?

Just for the record I still love the moon, I still love to stare at him and bask in his wonder and he still gives me that crooked smile of love.

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